(This is not posted here as an ad, I’m posting it because it was a true advertisement over the article mentioned in my post below. Ironic?)
I was surfing the web and came across a post on ksl.com titled “Romance Novels Can be as Addictive as Pornography”. I, of course, settled in to read what the “experts” had to say. They said that when men view porn there is a chemical feel-good that takes place in their bodies that can trigger addiction, and that when women read romance books they can get this same reaction and become addicted to romance books. The experts also say that this can lead to marital and relationship dissatisfaction. Well, Yeah, if you expect your sex partner to be one of those fabulous, sex-god, romantic heroes then I suppose so. Their suggestions: read other genres, exercise, get in a real relationship, find a hobby. (I love the ”exercise” and “find a hobby” suggestions, as if jogging, embroidery and scrapbooking were the answer to a good romantic read. I do read other genres and enjoy them also. Getting into another “real” relationship might find my hubby objecting….but I’ll ask.)
The follow up comments to this post were even more fun. I urge you to go read the article and comments.
Here’s a particularly astute comment from J.S. Wayne. I tried to find J.S. online and came across his blog http://jswayne.wordpress.com/
From J.S. Wayne: I read this article with a sense of slack-jawed horror.
Most of the women I know who read romance do so because it is an escape from reality. They are aware of the difference between reality and fantasy and do not confuse the two. With ANY art form, be it movies, books, TV, etc., there will always be a handful of people who will lose themselves in the fantasy to such a degree that it renders them incapable of functioning in the real world.
I don’t view pornography or romance as harmful, so long as the viewer does not get so lost in the fantasy that they forget about reality. My question is, “Why is the author of this article so afraid of human sexuality? What is it about the idea that human beings need intimacy that terrifies them so much?” I can’t decide whether to be bemused or alarmed that the author of this article seems to truly believe the tripe she’s spewing.
Sensationalist “reporting” like this does a great disservice. It implies that women are so weak-willed and weak-minded that if they so much as look at a romance novel, they will immediately throw away the entire life they’ve built to go chasing after Fabio.
I’m a hetero, married male who writes romance; as such, my livelihood depends on creating a fantasy. I certainly don’t find my (overwhelmingly female) fan base to be weak in ANY sense of the word. Many of them, I find to be dauntingly intelligent, professional women who live amazing and full lives. Implying that a rarity is the norm is misleading, insulting, and offensive; it smacks of the WORST kind of sexist thinking. And quite frankly, I find it utterly repugnant.
I would like to laugh at the way this was presented, or dismiss it as a joke, albeit one in execrably poor taste.
But I can’t. And that may be the most frightening thing ABOUT this article.
I agree with J.S. on all counts. Do You? What do you think, are we fooling ourselves and we really are addicted? (sigh…for me it sure beats my former cigarette addiction) What do you think of the advertisement in conjuction with the article?
Hi Dot,
I read this “article” over the weekend. I was royally pissed when I finished. What is it that makes people think that women need looking after like that? We are so feeble that we can’t even make decision about what we will read as we are bound to think it’s real. This woman’s theory is an offensively sexist piece of crap. One of the commenters made good point that people (not just men) that read spy fiction realize they are not in fact spies, but somehow romance novels divorce it’s readers from reality. And this woman has taken it upon herself to be the someone that comes to save us poor, lonely ill-adjusted, desperate women.
The ad is just too funny.
Nodding my head here, agreeing with all your points. The ad was the icing on the cake.
My apologies for not stopping by sooner, as promised. I’m afraid my schedule and my calendar exploded (luckily, I saved the blender. Priorities, right?)
It’s always a thrill and an honor to me when someone finds something I’ve written to be quoteworthy. It’s especially flattering when they see fit to reproduce it in its entirety! I stand by every assertion I made, because I treasure every single one of my fans and don’t cope well when they’re “dissed.” Funny: I’m more likely to bring out heavy artillery in defense of them than I am my own writing. Go figure.
Thank you so much for this, Dot! It really turned around an otherwise thoroughly rotten day in my world
Best,
J.S. Wayne
Hey J.S., I never worry about expressing my views when I can get some author to do it for me.
Thanks for stopping by.